Oh, Hai MTV - Quick Question....

Why Did Vinny Delpino show up at the VMAs last night?  And why did he call himself Joe Calderone? And why did everyone keep calling him Lady Gaga?



KthanksBai

Disaster Smugness Is A Thing Now

 It was so predictable that after the  earthquake that rocked the east coast today, folks in LA would mock their eastern counterparts  for all the hubbub over a mere 5.8er on Twitter. 

Listen, westies  how would you feel if you had a category 3 hurricane? or a blizzard?  Probably pretty rattled right?   Before we start teasting each other about who eats what for breakfast - remember the two locales are not EQUIPPED to swap disasters.  

Now say you're sorry and get back to fighting over baseball teams and Rap styles.  You know, the stuff that REALLY matters.

The Snooki/Situation Situation - MYSTERY SOLVED

In the most recent episode of Jersey Shore, we see that accusations are flying left and right between Snooki and Situation.

He says they were "together" while she was with Jionni (her boyfriend).  She VEHEMENTLY denies it all and says he's lying about everything.  Neither is budging, and it's hard to decipher who is telling the truth.  Each has a motive to lie:

• Snooks loves her boyfriend and will lose a relationship if it comes out that she cheated
• Situation has status to gain via a (fabricated or real) Snooki  love storyline since her star status is head and shoulders above all the other Jersey Shore stars

So which is it? Who is lying?  Well, there's a "tell" in the episode that swings the favor into Situation's court.  So what's the tell?  Believe it or not, it lies with the very person who was attempting to protect Snooki - JWOWW.

When Ronnie brings up the rumor, JWOWW's face reveals that she immediately recognizes the story as if she already has prior knowledge of an incident between Mike and Snooki. She then goes to tell Snooki and says something to the effect of  (paraphrasing) "Mike told everyone what happened between the two of you" - MEANING SOMETHING DID HAPPEN.  AND SNOOKI REACTED IMMEDIATELY - instead of saying "what happened between me and Mike?" she started flipping out right away. Innocents don't react like that, dontcha think?

So there, problem solved. YOU'RE WELCOME.

Few Pics From Inside Kim Kardashian's Wedding

Unless you've been living under 10 rocks, (because if you were living under one, you'd still have heard) you know that Kim Kardashian got married to some dude yesterday.

All was super paparazzi proof complete with tents and all -  so that all the shots and footage were protected for the magazine exclusives and E! special.  TMZ was all proud to get a fuzzy shot of Kim and Bruce Jenner walking through a tent which showed not much but IT WAS SOMETHING.

We haven't yet seen the decor etc.. inside UNTIL NOW.  Jillian Barberie Reynolds (local Los Angeles morning news personality and wedding guest) tweeted some shots of the inside in real time.  Check out the shots:

Jillian (@AskJillian) tweets "Oops. Snuck one in"

 

Ok, it may not seem like much, but let's walk through this carefully.  Next to Jillian's hand is what looks like some sort of program - meh.  But notice the table runner - doesn't it remind you of the decor in Mama Kris' house? Silverware and crystals are nice - not gaudy - understated and classy rather.  Loving the flowers and chandeliers.  Anyone notice anything else worth mentioning?

In a second image, Jillian tweeted "Oh snap!!!!! Another one!!!!"

This one is way more fuzzy - but shows more classic decor and beautiful flowers.  Shame we can't make out the identity of any of the guests in the shot. It's said that Kim asked her guests to only wear black or white.  Looks like most of the guests (at least in this pic) chose to wear black.  I think I would too - don't think I'd feel right wearing white to a wedding.  Even if the bride OK'd it.

Update on "The Talk" Our Beloved Remini Supposedly Out Too?

Well, woke up this morning upset and now I know why.

Today it's being reported widely that BOTH Holly Robinson Peete AND Leah Remini's contracts will likely not be renewed for The Talk.  

They definitely just lost a loyal viewer.  Leah Remini was pretty much one of the only reasons that show held my interest at all.  Love Sharon and Sara too.

Sadz.

Update 8/17/2011: Leah Remini has been tweeting back to fans the past couple of days.  When one fan asked (of a previous tweet) if Remini had "confirmed" her departure, Remini responded "I didn't baby. We have no official word yet"

So, though it looks grim, perhaps there's a teeny bit of hope as all the CBS execs continue to stay mum.  Perhaps they're all still talking it over???

RHONJ's Teresa Giudice and Jacqueline Laurita May Be Fighting, Y'all

[SEPTEMBER 28 UPDATE!!!!: CHECK OUT OUR POST ON THE LATEST RHONJ DRAMA HERE]

Hmmmm, first Ashley claims to be Team Gorga on Twitter, and now today Jacqueline comes out with a post show blog pointing many fingers at Teresa.

Interesting....

I'm really too lazy to paraphrase it - but basically JL tells TG that she thinks she's in the wrong when it comes to Melissa and Kathy. She also has a bone to pick with her about Danielle - but my eyes kind of glazed over that part because the story is so played out.

And you KNOW if Jacqueline and Teresa are on the outs, then Caroline and Teresa are probably on the WAY outs.  I think we may have a new villain!  Everyone thought it  would be Melissa in the beginning of the season.  Plot twist!

I can't even imagine what's going to happen when they all go on vacation together. 

Anyway, I can't find my funny bone today, but the blog is worth a read... head on over to BravoTV.com to check it out.

P.S. I feel ick today.  I wouldn't hate you if you sent a compliment or whatever payattentionto@gmail.com

[OCT. 24 UPDATE!!! DINA MANZO BREAKS HER SILENCE] 


[SEPTEMBER 28 UPDATE!!!!: CHECK OUT OUR POST ON THE LATEST RHONJ DRAMA HERE]

What? Joy Behar Is How Old?????

Okay, so by now you should have seen the news that Joy Behar married her boyfriend of nearly three decades. Meanwhile Sherrie Shepherd is getting married tomorrow - upstage much Joy?  But that's neither here nor there.

Because there is a MUCH bigger story here.  As I was reading one of the many articles reporting on Joy's nuptials, there, nonchalantly printed in plain black and white was her AGE - 68 years old!!!! This woman is 2 years away from 70??? Are you kidding me?????

My brain still can't process this.  She doesn't look a day over 55 AT THE MOST.  She's so vibrant and full of life.  Gotta say, we're impressed Joy.  And Congrats on tying the knot.

P.S. I feel ick today.  I wouldn't hate you if you sent a compliment or whatever payattentionto@gmail.com   

Some Questions About Real Housewives of New Jersey

Sponsored by:

Ashlee Holmes Laurita's baggy beret

• When Caroline is talking to Jacquline about inviting Kathy Wakile to her New Years Eve party, she says she "has to" because they are close with Albert.  Um, excuse me, did Kathy and her husband Richard not just meet with Albert for the first time a few episodes ago to seek his advice about buying a resrestaurant? Why would he care if they come to his party or not?  Caroline, just speak the truth and say THE PRODUCERS ARE MAKING ME INVITE THEM.  There, feel better now?
• How come I liked Teresa more before her family joined the cast?  I think she was better at masking the crazy before, but all the "realness" is coming out now that the dirty laundry is being aired.  AWKWARRRRD.  
• Why am I all of a sudden interested in reading Ashley Holmes' Twitter feed? Oh yeah, because she has NO FILTER!  Here's a few (alleged) nuggets gleaned from her updates: 
• she is not living in NJ anymore, now staying with her dad in Dallas - wonder why?  Was she kicked out?  Or was she just "so ova" her "mean mama?"
• She will soon be moving to Los Angeles, but she won't say why yet
• She is "TEAM GORGA" - no explanation yet given, perhaps we'll see it play out in a future episode.
• Why is Joe Gorga now my favorite person in the history of Bravo Reality TV? No, seriously, I need answers on this one.
• Why can't I get "On display... on display... on display" out of my head even though I ABSOLUTELY HATE THE SONG?????

There, thanks for letting me vent.  And if you have answers, please divulge!!!!

Jersey Shore - What Happened Last Night????

Needs more Arvin!! Please tell me someone sent him on a cargo plane straight to Italy sometime in this mess of a season.

Ok, first things first.  Who else feels like Situation is into Snooki because she's basically transformed into a LEGIT real life A list star?  I don't think he would have ever been into her (except to use her for a night) in the past.  But now, I think he sees a gravy train.  How creepy was the scene when she was bickering with Super Mario Jionni on the phone and he was just STANDING THERE.  Like a big creep.  Just eavesdropping and reveling in the fact that they were arguing. READY TO POUNCE. Ew. SO SHADY. 

The whole Deena/Pauly thing is kinda sad.  Like - we've all been there when we're drunk from infatuation and refuse to see the SIGNS that HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU.  Please tell me someone made a gif of the scene last week when they were "kissing" and Pauly had the saddest, most pained expression on his face.  Poor guy had to pretend he was sleeping to escape her.  P.S. Deena, we predict your tiger stripe tan lines will be the newest trend - kinda go with the tiger stripe hair....

So I was half right about Ronnie and Sammi hooking up by episode 2.  They didn't exactly "hook up" yet, but all the seeds have been planted.  Meanwhile, how HIGH SCHOOL MEAN is Ronnie - bragging about all the women he's bedded right in front of the poor girl.  I mean, Ronnie, she "magically grew" tatas for you right before Italy.  Why would you be so excited to BREAK SOMEONE who has that much love for you?  Oy, this guy - I just don't get it. 

The pizza job orientation scene was kinda lame.  MTV, who are we kidding here? We're still going with this whole "job" thing?  Is it really necessary?  THIS ISN'T REAL WORLD SEASON 2.  YOU DON'T HAVE TO MANUFACTURE CONFLICT.  It's already there! They're from Jersey, drama is their food.  They can't live without it. 

Um, what else.  I feel a little like deja vu watching this season.  Lot of the same old horse tricks.  Meh. Did I miss anything?

Jersey Shore Jersday!!! Time To Get Crazy, Get Wild

So, who's been watching the Snooki slash Situation media blitz?  Like seriously - the show already has a gazillion viewers, why does the cast even need to be out promoting the show? Well, actually, I take that back - their interviews now consist of them hocking their OWN wares - yes I'm looking at you Snooki's slippers (and book and Sitch's tuxeods eyrooollllllll). 

Oops, before I forget, here's our PSA of the day:

NEVER. GETS. OLD. So be careful guys, buckle up, don't drive drunk and all that good stuff.  Because, you know, Ronni may pop up out of nowhere.  And then unleash his wrath on your room an hour later.  Eek, hope you don't wear glasses. Just sayin.

Anyhow, back to Snooki's media blitz (I mean cause who really cares about watching Situation on a talk show saying "You know.... I mean..... You know..... "a gazillion times), how much did we love seeing Super Mario Jionni back stage everywhere she went? Gotta say - all sarcasm  aside - they're a really cute couple.

Okay, so enough of that.  It's Jersday and we're all kinds of pumped up.  According to our calculations (see predictions from last Thursday's post) it's about time for Sammi and Ronnie to be hooking up again, dontcha think? 

P.S. I have a question - why are all the girls minus Sam now wearing those colored hair extensions in the under part of their hair?  I mean, Christina Aguilera circa 2000 is making a come back now?  Guess I better go buy some hurrrrrr.

The Way To My Heart: Kris Jenner Edition

Okay - so my love for Kris Jenner has been growing steadily. 

Not just because she's the absolute butt of every eye roll, joke and lesson on Keeping Up With The Kardashians, but because no other genius across this crazy world could have created such a masterpiece as the Kris Jenner Turns 30 video"I Love My Friends" (circa 1980s) (click here to see it, can't embed).  Sorry in advance for the fact that you won't EVER be able to get the lyric "Bible Study...Cheesecake Factory...." out of your heads. 

Okay, but now there's an even BIGGER reason to be down with the Jenner.  She is coming out with a MEMOIR.  That's right folks - it's time for Kris to finally shine!  She released this image of  the cover today on her blog.

Notice how she slipped in the Kardashian "brand" in there to make sure it receives maximum benefit?  Ever the genius marketer, Kris has marketed herself right into our cold little hearts.  We love it!

Jersey Shore Ronnie's New Car!

Check out Ronnie's (AKA Agro Magro - yes we just made that up and we thing it's the most genius thing ever created by our minds) new car.

He just tweeted "Check out the new ride!" w/this pic.  Frankly, I was expecting a Bentley like Situation bought last year.  And why does it already have plates? Does that mean it's a used one at that?

Gotta say, Agro Magro, we're impressed if you're actually being SMART with your money by buying a nice, but modest and gently used car.  Other reality stars could learn a thing or two from you! Well, not the whole destroying your girlfriend's property into oblivion.  But definitely this! Baby steps.

Thoughts on the Lopez Tonight - Conan Debacle

Okay, so unless you've been living under a rock today, you've already heard that TBS abruptly cancelled Lopez Tonight (due to icky ratings) and tomorrow will be the last show. 

So of course people are all pointing at Conan O'Brien and are all "OMG he did the same thing to George Lopez that Jay Leno did to him!!!! What a hypocrite."

To that I say pshaw.  I know it makes for a dramatic story folks, but Conan didn't "screw" George Lopez over.  Why?  Because when TBS approached Conie last year to move his show to their network, he said no because he didn't want to do that to George Lopez. Then, GL himself called Conan and said please come to TBS I think it would be a good thing for ALL of us if you did.

So tell me folks.  What did Conan do wrong? And why exactly is he a hypocrite? Huh? Huh? Huh?

Currently Watching: Flipping Out

FLIPPING OUT

HELLO THERE JEFF LEWIS!

So I'm just sitting here bored watching Flipping Out -  a comfortable old friend and one of the first shows that sucked me into BRAVO-Land.  Here is some totally unstructured commentary (cause I'm lazy, natch):

Question:  If Zoila is the maid, what exactly does Jett do as the "House Assistant?"  I mean, Jeff Lewis' house is like, what, three bedrooms at most??? Why would it take two full time workers to upkeep an already fixed up house?

Okay,  this whole housekeeper is on a break, and replacement housekeeper is better is LITERALLY ripped from an episode of Two and a Half Men.  So is this what it's come to now?  We're stealing storylines from SITCOMS???? WOW.

Why doesn't Chaz understand where Jeff's coming from?  HELLO, how can you meet a deadline when you need the approval of someone who is NEVER there on every teensy detail?  This reminds me of the time I worked at a certain fast food establishment at the tender age of 28 16, and the almighty "Assistant Manger" had to approve the crispiness of each hash brown before I could serve them.  So, maybe I had a history of leaving them raw, I was in a hurry okay - that was a HIGH PRESSURE JOB. Like, get off me and let me live!!!

P.S. How good does Zoila look after her face lift? And how much do we love Gage?  And how much did we hate that lady who was mean to Jenny last week? Ugh, she was terrible.

Commercial time, I'll continue to update as the show goes on.  

P.P.S. I don't know why the spacing is messed up on this post, but I don't know how to fix it.

Not a fan of the glass tile for Chaz's salon that has been a storyline for what, like 3 episodes now?  Jeff, I thought you were an expert at this stuff? Git'er done!

Ok, this whole Trace thing is weird.  AmIRite? I get the whole control issue of requesting to be CC'd on emails.  Trace's whole aura screams shady, so Jeff Lewis HAS to keep the reigns tight.  Hello, that's like "Control Issues 101" and I have a PHd, so trust me, I'm an expert.

Eww, how grossed out are we by the Rocco's Dinner Party commercial where he finds a hair in his food????? BARF BARF BARF.

Ok, we have a little more clarity now in Jett's role.  He's a shoe shiner slash light bulb scientist.  Mystery solved!!!

Ohhhhhhhhh, Trace, you in danger girl.  Designing your closet on Jeff Lewis' watch? EEEEEEEEE, gotta make some popcorn before the showdown twixt them. 

I love the "Impromptu Review" warning.  <<bites nails>>.  I also  love how when Jeff's mad, right before he unleashes, he leads with the positive - I always brag about you and how great you are blah blah blah.

FINISH HIM JEFF!!!!! 

P.P.P.S, why is Gage present for all of the firings?  I think he's the real brains behind the whole operation.  Is it just me or did he just give a "dance puppet dance" look to Jeff as he fired Trace.  I think Gage set the whole thing up because he's jealous of the hot young guy in the office. Well, at least, that's what I would have done if I were him.

Okay, so I just tracked down Trace's Twitter account and SIDE NOTE: he has more Twitter followers than our beloved Chet Haze!!!! How is it possible that a fourth string character on a mediocre (sorry Jeff, love ya) reality show has more love than the son of a MEGA LEGEND ACTOR who is taking the rap world BY STORM?????? HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Meanwhile, I'm getting sick of this post so I'll stop here.  Meh.

Guess The Change.... Snooki Edition

Hmmmm... Something about our little Snooks looks Diff-AH-rent, but we just can't put our finger on it....

Source: Snooki's Twitter @Sn00ki

Any ideas?

Did You Hear That Apple Has More Money Than Exxon Now?

APPLE Say What?????

I mean, try not to be shocked that I know this - I do read the regular news during reality show commercial breaks.  Weird right? Well, to me - the business minded mogul - it's weird because like don't oil companies have more money than anything else that ever existed ever? 

First Apple has more money than the USA, then Exxon?  They practically own the ENTIRE world now. 

I Work Twice As Hard To Get Half As Much

 
Oh hai there my little children (imagine me in sunglasses smugly looking down at you ever so slightly) - just in case you were wondering, our website is now a legit contender.  We never thought we'd reach these traffic levels, and wow the fan mail is Ahhh-MAYYYY-zingggg.  Please keep the compliments coming because we're not sure our fragile ego will ever be able to take not getting fan mail ever again. 

Anyway, we want you to EMAIL us some of your questions - about ANYTHING - us, current events, your mom, and if they're good, we'll do a whole post answering them.

Get started now, send your email to PAYATTENTIONTOBLOG@GMAIL.COM.  We're waiting, like no, literally, we're sitting with our GMAIL open and hitting "Refresh" ever ten seconds.

Please, send them now!!! GO, GO GO!!!!!

What's Going On Over at CBS' "The Talk" ??????

Oh yeah - before I forget, much to my surprise we've (AKA I've)  built quite the ad revenue business here.  This post is brought to you by our newest sponsor:

That Awkward Moment When Kris Jenner 

Tries to Start Jump-roping With You

Ok - back to the issue at hand.  Is there more dramz going on at The Talk????

 The Twalk

First of ollll (read that in a Jersey accent), before I get deeper into this - some full disclosure.  I have absolutely fallen in love with The Talk in recent months.

I really wanted to hate it at first.  When it first came out as the new kid in town, I was all - "How lame, I will NEVER watch that rip off - I'm loyal to the dysfunctional hens at The View and I have no more room in my heart for this drivel."

Cut to 6 months later - when I don't even watch The View anymore and the entire world stops for my quality time with Chen bot and the ladies.  Converting to The Talk is  kind of like leaving a bad marriage you were overly loyal to and tried to save, and then you start a new HEALTHY relationship and you're all "oh my gosh, I didn't know this was how it's supposed to be.  I mean, he calls me just to say hi, and chooses a night in with me over clubbing with his friends.  WOW."

And we can't NOT mention our girl crush on Leah Remini. I mean, we've always loved her in KOQ (King of Queens - keep up!!!!) and even cut our bangs whenever she did on the show, but this new love is on another level.  I mean is she not the cutest feistiest little thing in the world?  Like, she's a puppy but a vicious honey badger all rolled into one and you CANNOT NOT hang on to every word she says.  

But  I digress.  Now we there may be dramz...... ???? We've always heard whispers that some of the ladies don't get along with one another - but they mask it really well so it was hard to decipher the real story, but HRP (Holly Robinson Peete) was always mentioned.

Anyhoo - as you probably know, Sharon Osbourne has already announced that she will be taking "a break" from the show to spend time with her family or get a boob job or something like that.  But most recently HRP went on record saying that she has no idea whether she'll be back for the new season because they haven't picked up her option and she's kind of in the dark right now.

What is going on?????? We need to know the real story.  We know Leah and Holly have become friends in real life so it can't be due to a rift between them.  And we suspect that Sharon and Holly were never one another's biggest fans based on how they interact on the show.  But that's all we got.   What do you guys think????????? We're dying to know more. 

Real Housewives of New Jersey: New Year, Same Teresa

 Okay, before I get started, I'd like to thank our sponsor for today.  This post is generously brought to you by:

Category Five Hurricane Slash Twister Melania Giudice - AKA our new favorite person

Okay, now that the housekeeping is out of the way, what is going on with Teresa? No, like really, like I'm actually getting worried in a "no I'm not" kind of way.

Does she ever hear anybody else when they talk?  I mean, true, she's the only reason most people - AKA me - watch the show, but sometimes that one trick pony has got to learn a new trick.

It was a little boring this time around watching the now tired stoy line of the Giudice/Gorga/Wakile rift play out.  But what was more painful was seeing Tre's (that's what Joe and I call her) hypnotizingly blank stare every time anyone with an ounce of sense tried to get through to her.  It's getting creepy -  like stage  Bensimon red alert.

You can tell Caroline - the resident voice of reason with a new greaser hairdo - is starting to secretly hate Teresa.  And Jacqueline isn't far behind.  It's like Tre, get over it.  Oohhhhhhhhh she tried to say hi to you at a party.  Wow, what an evil person.  And oh my gosh, she invited her first cousin (AKA your brother AKA move over Gia there's a new star of the show  Joe Gorga) to her Christmas gathering.  She is evil incarnate.

Listen girl.  No sister of sweet angel "Can Do No Wrong In My Eyes" Rosie can be that bad. 

But the best part  came during the WWHL after show, when innocent little well-meaning Harry Potter impostor Jerry O'Connell (AKA the fat kid from Stand By Me - and some other stuff too - but this is all that matters)  tried to rationally reason with Teresa about how she could be nicer to her family.  Ha ha ha, poor kid really thought she'd take what he had to say to heart.  Listen Jerry: Teresa eats people like you for breakfast - and she does it while she's getting Juicy Joe out of bed, fighting with Melania about who's boss and online shopping for $1 million dollar's of super classy Louis XIV inspired furniture.  I think her blank stare bore a hole into his soul.

Also, I'm actually sad because Teresa is making me warm up to Melissa Gorga.  And I NEVER thought that would happen.  Melissa, call me, we'll make a Poshe run and then hit up Chateau to get our acrylics filled in.

Finally, a check in with Ashlee Holmes Laurita- yep, she's still wearing baggy berets on her head.

Jersey Shore Season 4 ITALY - First Show - IMPRESSIONS

- first of ollllllll - how are we feeling about these Stacker 2 - 6 hour power energy shots commercials with Deena and Sammi? Basically, you know some MTV Ad Sales exec sold the ad space and promised Sitch and Snooki to the Stacker 2 guys, and pulled the old bait and switch w/the bottom 2.

OK - Let's get the elephant in the room out of the way.  WE'RE ALREADY PRETTY SURE  SAMMI had breast implants (ALLEGEDLY) -we cracked that code back in February before they even left for Italy.  See here.  So why is she being all coy? Pretending like she hasn't had them when Nicole says they she should be getting implants together?  And Sammi, don't think we didn't notice you asking the boobie pro JWOWW all those implant maintenance questions.  Mmmmm hmmmmmmm.

Second of olllllllllll - WTF about Situation and Snooki?  Sex?????????? But but, what about little Super Mario Brother Jionni? We love him. Memba this???

The lil ones were happy and snorkeling once upon a time.
Anyhoozles, we're gonna have to side with Ron and NOT BELIEVE SITCH'S LYING A$$.   SERIOUSLY, DUB TEA EFF.  And how creepy was Mike kissin on Snooks in the club?   Where's Ronnie creepin' behind the plant when you need one?  Oh Hai Ron....

Eww can we talk about the pigeons for a sec?  No not Deena, (just kiddin' Deena girl, call me, we'll hang out at the Strip Mawl) actual pigeons - how much did that scene give me a flashback of being in Florence, San Marcos Square  when they swooped down and stole my $60 snack right out of my little 7 year old paw.  Trauma.

Oh yeah, what's the over under on when Sammi and Ronnie are gonna get back together?  We say by episode 2 at the latest.

Whadya you guys all think??????????