Saturday, October 02, 2010

Office Buzzwords - Exposed!

  • organic - we didn't plan anything or research it properly
  • synergize - a polite way of asking if one can piggyback off your budget and hard work while diluting your success
  • deck - a presentation document peons spend hours poring over for big cheese. Many meetings spent going back and forth over minutiae followed by late nights making change after change. 
    • weeks of deck preparation typically followed by anticlimactic moment when presentation is given to group of people who derail the discussion or completely tune it out.
    • extra bonus points  when said big cheese talks on and on, forgetting to click through slides eventually skipping through most of it
  • relevance - an irritating word applied to anything that's common sense marketing 101
  • resonates - see relevance
  • dynamic - a ghost word that has lost all original meaning. now just amorphic filler that can take the shape of any box you'd like put it into.
  • engage - not bore the sh!#t out of
  • workstream - a fancy term that makes a mundane task sound more important
  • tweaks - a polite way to say 'you need to change everything'
  • sharepoint/shared workspace - a vison of a utopian world where people can be more efficient and share documents and information. synonym: virtual ghost town

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