Kim Zolciak's New 11,000 Sq. Ft. House?

Kim Zolciak is allegedly moving on up from her townhouse in Duluth, GA to a sprawling $3.2 million 11,000 sq. ft. estate located on two acres of land in nearby Roswell.  The news was revealed yesterday by Zolciak's daughter Brielle on her Formspring page.

The new  house boasts such luxury features as 3 kitchens, an elevator, and a 30 seat theater just to name a few.This is a big step up for Kim whose 3.3k sq. ft. Duluth townhouse listed for just under $500,000 late last year.

No word on whether Kroy will be living in the new house - but who wouldn't want to live there?  Congrats to the growing Zolciak family.

UPDATE 3/10/2011: Kim just Tweeted this about hoping they accept her offer on a house:

(images via Zillow.com)

Real Housewives of Atlanta Reunion - Kinda Meh. No?

Source:  TwitPic, Plixi or YFrog via Twitter

So last night, we popped the popcorn, got on our "bigger" sweats (hey, it's winter) and settled into the couch to watch the promised "explosive" RHOA reunion.  As each minute passed, becoming more "meh" than the last, we tried to convince  ourselves to "stay pumped" and that something dramatic would happen real soon.

Ugh, such was not the case.

• Yes Kim and Nene "had it out" but it wasn't anything we hadn't heard before. AND they looked like they were just going through the motions in their one major tete a tete (<-- is that how you spell that????), you know, for contractual reasons.   This time, it really seemed like it was all for the cameras.  But in all seriousness, how many of you think Nene's changed?  She's just mean all the time now - like last season's Jill Zarin in NY, no?
• They kept trying to make us care about Cynthia the "runaway bride."  Listen, Cynthia is gorgeous for sure, but crazy eyes scare men away.  Period.  We have a feeling the running in her past wasn't done by her. 
• Poor Kandi wasn't really even given a chance to talk. But there's promise she will have more of a part next week when she has it out with Kim over money for her songs.  

On the brighter side...

• It was nice to see the "real" side of Phaedra.  Here level-headedness and "lawyered-up" vernacular convinced us that she is in fact a smart business woman and not the ridiculous caricature she portrays on the show.  Looks like she dropped the act in the reunion.  Not sure if that bodes well for her or not because if Nene or Kim leave, we need a new drama queen to step up and Phaedra is our only hope.
• We liked Sheree's new hair AND Kandi's.  We're not sure why all the hate about Kandi's hair.  Derek J is a master and you WILL respect his work!

Some predictions:

• We think Nene probably wants her own show.  We wouldn't be surprised if she's vying for it behind the scenes as we speak.
• We think Kim will actually be the one to get her own show.  She not only can carry it in her own right, but she brings with her an interesting cast of characters.

P.S. are we leaving anything out??? Leave a comment!!!

Real Housewives of Atlanta Finale: Um, Couple Things

All season long, every time I see Peter (Cynthia's man), I have this nagging feeling like he looks like someone but I just couldn't put my stinger on it.  So then I'm sittin' there watching the wedding scene and it hit me like a ton of Suzuki motorcycles. He looks like a grown DMX (rapper from the 90s).  AmIRite or AmIRite??? Sorry I don't have the energy to do a side by side comparison.  Please use your imagination or do a Google Images search.

Raugh Raugh

Wonder if Cynthia was mad that Princess Derek J stole her thunder at the wedding with that smart Virgina Slims pantsuit he had going on.  We see what you did there Miss J.

Time to watch some Kim n Kroy WWHL...

Derek J Has The Sads

We don't like it when our favorite diva is down.  Derek J (of Real Housewives of Atlanta and Good Hair and World Renowned Hair Artiste and Thick Stems And 'Lettos fame ) has a case of the sads today and we're calling out whoever is messin' with our precious scoop of pudding.

Hrmph. Kim, he better not be talkin' bout you.

Here's our lady of ferocity in happier times. Nobody can work an opaque tight like Mr. J.

Source: Derek J's Twitter (@DerekJHair)

Feel better boo boo. We got you.

Click here to see our "Moment" with Der Der and Kimmy Z

Real Housewives of Atlanta (RHOA) Reunion - First Look Leaks!

Some fun leaking going on in Twittville today. 

Andy Cohen has had a heck of a time getting to the A.T.L. for the RHOA Reunion.  What with his flight to Atlanta getting cancelled and an icy overnight in Birmingham. He finally boarded a private (looking) plane for the land of the peaches:

Phew! Good thing because the Twitter war between Nene and Kim Zolciak has certainly whet our appetites though [I know I didn't do a story on it, but Jezebel did. Basically Nene was implying Kim was a transvestite and slammed her for having 3 baby daddies - Meanwhile, doesn't Nene have 2?  Not that there's anything wrong with either, but that's a pretty slim margin for the pot to call the kettle black.  Miss Kim actually kept it pretty classy, rebuffing most of Nene's digs.  So there you have it].

Andy is finally safe in snowy Atlanta, and it looks like he's having fun with our BFF Kim  and her hair game cause he leaked this cute pic:

They're on the set of the Reunion as I click these keys. 

Also looks like our other BFF Derek J is now doing Kandi's hair too, because he just Twatted her fierce new look:

Loving the longer hair and highlights guuuurrrrrl!

Back to Kim and Nene. What do you think? Is their latest feud (which appears to erupt in next week's RHOA episode judging from the teaser) all hype? Or is it for real?

Timing seems kind of convenient, but you never know with these two.

Any other info out there? Hit us up at payattentiontoblog@gmail.com

Don't Be Jealous. I had a "Moment" with Kim Zolciak and Derek J. - FABULOUS!!

Kim Zolciak's lazy fabulousness and Derek J's (of RHOA and Good Hair fame - if you haven't seen Derek's swag in Good Hair, go rent it immediately) unapologetic fiercenes are two bulls in the china shop of Real Housewives.  And that's why they're my favorites. 

Do I usually laugh at minions begging for celebrity ReTweets like London-town street urchins? Yes, yes I do. 

Did I have a moment(s - pluralizing because I do it all the time, I just like to judge others with my holier than thou self) of gushing pandering in hopes of acknowledgement? Why yes, yes I did:

 

Um... yeah, so then this happened!!!!!:

Holy Sh1t, holy sh1t, the tweet did mean a thing.......

And if my heart didn't stop long enough. Then THIS HAPPENED!!!

HEART ATTACK.

For more RHOA ridiculousness, check out Real Housewives of Atlanta - I'm Getting Lazy and
RHOA Rundown - Check You and Um Hi You - Andy Cohen - Can We Twalk?

AND - don't forget to follow me on Twitter @payattentionto

Week In Review

Hot links coming through.

Ok, so what happened this week.  Wellllll.......

• We (royal "we" but I like to pretend I have a media empire and I command a massive newsroom of hacks) published a lazy little recap of the Real Housewives of Atlanta (RHOA). Almost as lazy as Kim Zolciak "performing" Google Me as she leaned up against a bar stool on Watch What Happens Live (see talented artist - AKA me - rendition above).
• We tried to start a new "daily" post called Some Things You Should Know which we did for approximately one day and then when NOBODY read it we threw a stapler (ok, it was really a bag of Funyuns) across the room and vowed to chill out and take some Valerian Root because nobody understands me, I mean us.  May try again soon. Pageviews are votes people.
• We learned that most people are clueless when it comes to the social graces of Facebook.
• And speaking of Facebook, we had a revelation that cartoon characters as profile pictures doesn't make an ounce of difference to/for abused kids.
• We discovered that the strongest member of the Palin clan has nothing on the weakest member of the Kardashian clan when it comes to the almighty word of the Twitter bird.
• And finally, us execs from the top floor came down to the newsroom and hung out with the little writers late Friday knocking  back some scotch and pondering the meaning of the world (AKA hung out at home alone on a Friday night watching Comedy Central, eating microwave melted cookie dough and admiring Kevin Bacon).

Real Housewives of Atlanta - I'm Getting Lazy

So, I'm getting lazy, it's Tuesday evening and I'm just now getting to addressing RHOA.  It didn't move me enough to get off my a$$ and do a character by character recap in real-time.  I'll shoot for this on Thursday with RHOBH. 

Ok so I don't really know what was up with the 1:15 minute episode this past Sunday.  It's not like it was so action-packed they couldn't shave a bunch off (AKA every single Cynthia segment - bore bore snore snore) and we would've walked away with the same picture in our heads. A bit underwhelming.  Here's my half ass attempt at pretending I cared about any of this week's mess:

• I'm not even going to lie and say that I watched the Cynthia scenes. I fast forward'd through them, no time to waste on these wet noodles.  Though I will say, in my FF frenzy, it looked like they had some sort of mixed bag entourage with them - who were these fools?  Didn't really care enough to invest.
• Another disappointment, nothing interesting enough on the Kim front - except her amazing awesome outfit when she went purity ring shopping with her offspring. I present you the latest in classy fashion:

Photo (c) Bravo

• Ugh sorry that's a crappy pic (all I could find) that makes it look like she was wearing an             innocent little maxi dress.  You gotta take my word (which isn't worth much, sorry) there was a ton of side boobage and striperella strappy bikini back action going on.  Moving on, who else is getting sick of this Kim/Kandi cold war of words over Tardy for the Party  money? You can't stretch this non story over 8 episodes and not have anything new to share. 
•  Ok, so on to Kandi.  Can we please get off this Kandi Koated Nights nonsense?  Really, does anyone watch this cracker jack operation?  I just went over to the KKN to see if I can get a viewer count, but that thing is held together with masking tape, almost froze my computer so I had to bolt.  Kandi - stop talking about vaginas 24/7 it's like vajayjay this and coochie that.  Ugh yes we get it you are a "freak" go to Craigslist and don't drag us in the middle of things we can't unhear. 
•  I'm not going to waste too much time on Phaedra today since she's usually the centerpiece of these recaps (and she was only on for like 30 seconds).  Anyone else feel like her husband has a side piece?  There's a sort of I'm a subservient kept man who will get the last laugh glimmer in his eye dontcha think? And why did they get home from the hospital and get all comfy before going back to the car for the baby?
• This brings me to Nene. I am convinced that Nene thinks there's a reality show category at the Oscars.  First with the Melanie Griffith Working Girl storyline last week and now this week with the Kramer v. Kramer slash War of the Roses drama with Gregg.  That was some good stuff Nene, I have a feeling Andy Cohen will pull some strings and get the Bravo folks to cough up a fake Oscar and awards ceremony 2 episode special....
• Saving the best for last - award for keeping my attention longest this week went to Sheree and Dr. Tyee (of pervy finger-licking and sandal wearing, super serious, important, for real online degree fame).  The lunchtime showdown between these two is the stuff I liver for.  Tyee is the shadiest of the shady, he oozes "I'm lying" from every pore of his body.  My favorite part of course, was the end when he pulled his paper proof (AKA fake University of Phonix diploma written with a Sharpie in his car 5 minutes before the date) that he has a PhD but refused to show it to her unless she'd prove to him that she was really a woman. But how sad was I when he walked off into the sunset? Bravo, find a way to get him back in stat (or get some more Dwight scenes to fill this void).

For more Housewives/Bravo commentary,  check out Andy Cohen, Can We Twalk, RHOA 11/23 Check You and Real Housewives of Beverly Hills - Check You.

Real Houswevies of Atlanta (RHOA) Rundown - Check You

G-O-O-G-L-E Me... (no seriously, I need some search engine optimization for real up in here).

Season 3, Episode 8.  Ladies, I'm gonna have to check you.  Let's get to it...

Phaedra: 

• Please tell me this "lawyer" did not just say that the lady fingers are filled with "barbarian cream" what in the, WHAT?
• Phaedra, we aren't stupid.  In the early scenes, we know that you told your doctor and your husband to go along with this whole "36 weeks but full term" nonsense on camera because you're hiding a deep, dark soap opera secret about that baby.
• Admitting Nurse: "how many weeks are you?" Phaedra: "I don't know" hmmmm.......
• OOHHH!!! 28 min in and the doctor finally sells Phaedra out!!! "You're at 40 weeks" mmm hmmmmm. He couldn't lose sleep over these lies anymore (or he couldn't keep track)
• Favorite Phaedra quote (aside from barbarian cream): "The first time I looked at him, he just looked Chinese to me"

Kandi:

• 30 min. in and I still don't have anything interesting to write about Kandi yet. She's kind of like the glue that holds the storylines together but that's about it.

Nene:

• I love that Nene put on her best "Working Girl" Melanie Griffith shoulder-padded blazer and marched down to the local TV station to get herself a job.  Go on with your independent woman self Nene.
• Nene has celebrities on speed dial, just in case you didn't know. 
• Once you piss off Michael Lohan, you're pretty much black-balled. Guess Nene doesn't know that yet. 

Kim:

• Out of what gutter did you pick up that orange wig you dusted off and gave to Kandi???
• Just fyi, a high school biology class does not constitute a nursing degree
• Kim, why did your "can I smoke in the car?" (Kandi: "no") "then I ain't coming" make me laugh so hard I near fell off the couch? Kim is so relaxed but in your face about everything. My brain doesn't know how to make sense of it.

Sheree:

• Look at Sheree  talking up Tyee (of finger licking Tyee fame) because her ex-husband is in ear shot.  Obvious, but entertaining.
• Finally, 40 minutes in, Tyee shows up!! happy dance. Wait, what's up with his sandals? I mean, the fact that he's wearing sandals - with a blazer and trousers.
• Okay, is it just me or did you kinda feel bad for the feller as the entire group grilled him about this "Dr." nonsense. 
• BRB, going to get my online doctor certification at the Eastern Southern Illinois College.
• UPDATE: Forgot to mention I just read that damn Aston Martin Sheree flaunted up and down the streets this episode has already been repossessed. SMH

Closing thoughts:
Okay guys, I'm a Dr. now! Phew, it was a hard 7 minutes, but I persevered.  Just printed out my diploma and everything. 

• Favorite quote from upcoming scenes
• Dr Tyee (to Sheree): "prove that you're a woman"
• Lisa: I see what you did there. Your name isn't bolded here, but it sure looks like you're trying hard to get back into that status.....  

 For more Housewives/Bravo commentary, check out Andy Cohen, Can We Twalk and Real Housewives of Beverly Hills - Check You.

Um, Hi - You. Andy Cohen. Can We Twalk?

Andy Cohen (I know you're reading this right now. Let's not pretend you don't have Google Alerts on yourself. And we know the're set to "as it happens" stedda the more demure "once daily" option) Hi, what's up? Just wanted to say thanks for ruining my life with these crap mess shows.  I'm the junkie to your Colombian drug cartel. 

So tonight I caught up on some of my stories, starting with "Real Housewives of Atlanta: a Sugar Vajay Affair," folllowed by "Millionaire Matchmaker: Menopuase in Shorts Edition" and then Kathy Griffin's "Ho on Crutches."

I need to get some stuff off my chest.  Let's start with RHOA (it's an industry term):

• Phaedra - a) thank you for ruining pickles for me for at least a week (what? I like pickies in my tuna - don't make that perverted, seriously tuna salad on wheat, get your mind out of the kindergutter).  b) Nene's right, if you're gonna be shady about a due date - be a better lawyer about it.  You should have been cross-examining those women, confusing them with bloody gloves and venn diagrams, and c) we all know that you bought the Gucci diaper bag and forced your man to present it to you at the Mother's Day dinner party.  For a girl who likes to go around reminding everyone how classy she is, that was some tacky ish.
• Kim - stop yelling at your assistant, it's not cute.  And pay Kandi for her tracks. 
• Nene - love you girl.  How come the most jaded of us haters all love Nene?  Cause boo keeps it real.  Stay strong mama - rock that fierce  2.nose (see what I did there?) 
• Kandi - we need to get you a story line. Oh, and thanks to your back asswards advice, gynecologists across America will be rull busy soon.
• She by Sheree - somethin ain't right about Tyee - but I can't put my (FINGER OH MY GOD FINGER COOKIE DOUGH MY EYES BARF BARF HAIL MARY HAIL MARY) on it.
• New Tall Girl- I don't really know you yet, but tell your man to step off Nene. 

Ok, on to Millionaire HatchetMaker. 

• I'm not even going to get to the millionaires in this episode. Snobby gay guy is too easy. And drunky  douche from Brooklyn without an original thought in his head who seeks approval and validation from his meathead friends on any move he makes INCLUDING A GIRL ON A FIRST DATE - you get a hall pass this week.
• This is all about Patti. Because homegirl officially jumped the shark this episode. 
• Honey, something happens when you decide to cut yourself off from the real world and surround yourself with "yes men"  that depend on you for a living. (By the by, guess what - at night as they're taking down the mohawk and uncurling their pink bangs, they talk about how much of a joke you are - or they run away and do tell alls in Star Magzine - but I digress).  Something happens when you cruelly judge women in a lineup episode after episode.   
• Honey, you're like a bad pschology experiment gone wrong. I've seen bowls of oatmeal more self aware than you are.  I know you think you're cute and that we're chortling at those sad little match stick girls with you, but please don't get this mess twisted, we're laughing AT you.  
• Last night was literally the straw that broke the heffer's back.  When you started telling gay guy to stop being arrogant and judgey with people and made him wear ugly makeup to see how it feels when he acts that way towards people - my Lean Cuisine microwave pizza almost cashed in its return receipt. I literally did the Heidi Montag open mouth outrage stare at the TV for 10 minutes. 
• And girlfriend, we know you're really a sensitive salamander on the inside. Don't act like we don't remember the episode 2 seasons ago when the cougar client said your bangs were nasty. You may think you got her good chewing her out and kicking her out of your elite "Club," bit we've never seen you in bangs since. 
• Oh, one last thing.  Somebody lied to you about those shorts.    

Finally - a quick word on Kathy's special.  I wanted to like it, I really did.  Kathy - remember like 5 specials ago when you said that Oprah got better when she gained weight?  Well I think the unforgetting hand of fate has turned the tables on you.  Oh, and 1996 Gwen Stefani wannabe called, she wants her baby tee back. Seriously what is up with your on stage outfits?  You're all class-act-lady-who-lunches everywhere you go, then suddenly 5 minutes before every show you run into  a broom closet to put on your never evolving black pants (or dickies?) schmoutfit. Sup with that?  Sup?

Oh and P.S. Andy, why can't I stop watching "Watch What Crappens?"  I think it's because I NEED  to know what new Disorano on the rocks "not a sponsor" mixed drink you're rockin every week in the "faux millionaire's study in a jersey warehouse basement" setup you got goin' there.  We cracked the code on why the shot is so tight.  Geesh Bravo spring the extra $50 at the garage sale to make the mockuparlor set more than 4' x 4'. Sometimes we need a wide shot to keep us ensconced in the make believe. You're piercing the veil of our fantasy worlds.

Mzl (that's short for Mazel Tov so it doesn't take as much space).
     
Payce.